Carpe Noctem I – CH: 1

Before you read, if you are new to my blog I would encourage you to read the Preface to Carpe Noctem I – HERE. I would also encourage you to read chronologically. Reading the preface, and the chapters in order, will give you the best understanding and idea of this Journal Blog. Enjoy!


Chapter One – This book, this pen

I must say I love this book, and I really enjoy this pen. It’s ink is very smooth wouldn’t you say? I’m not sure what to call this overwhelming force to write. My insides tell me that this urge to write is nature, I must follow the order. Through out this medium I will try to write as legible as possible, I may never know who reads this. I’m not even sure what “This” is. Regardless of what is written, this book is great. The smell and texture is impressive. It has a nice spine and cover. This is very tangible. You’re holding it right now, wouldn’t you agree? Perhaps that’s what I enjoy most, that it’s tangible. My thoughts flowing from my head to the tip of this pen. Tangible thoughst. I meant thoughts. Interesting, I’ve made a mistake, permanent ink and it just doesn’t matter. I’m sure we can all forgive me. My goal, I think, is to write down as much as possible for as long as possible today. I’m sure that if I could have this entire book filled by nightfall, I would. Maybe have entire volumes or records of my thoughts will bring me peace, or joy to others. I just remembered, the reason I am writing only on this side of the book is because this ink is dark. I was afraid that the ink from the back side of the page would distract readers. There I go, assuming I will have readers, or that I will even want “This” read. I am a man of appreciation though. Maybe some one would admire this. Maybe critics would tear me a part. Making points about my low writing capabilities, grammar mistakes, or useless flow of words and sentences with no point. None the less, I will write, that decision can be made another day. Besides, it would be nice thought wouldn’t it? To have a collection of your thoughts, on your own bookshelf. Tangible evidence of your work. Being able to read them again and reflect with yourself.  Right now there is just a constant flow of thoughts and ideas that I want to write down. I’d like to question writer’s block. Will I ever have it? Possibly, possibly not. I’m sure it’s impossible to determine after only writing a couple of pages in this small book. We shall see, but if we are constantly thinking and this book is merely a continuation of my thoughts, than I should never have a problem. Only time will tell with continued writing. I wonder how many times I will contradict or repeat myself. I suppose I should also thin about paragraphs. Right now I’m just writing sentence after sentence and not breaking up what I am writing down. Part of me cares and part of me doesn’t. It’s my own free will to write how I choose I suppose. Or maybe, my natural instincts are flaring up again. Calling me a fool and saying, If someone reads this they will lose interest. There is no way to read it in a  day. You must give the audience breaks between thoughts. Or maybe it isn’t my natural instincts, maybe it’s my ego. Telling me that someone, somewhere would read this. That it’s important for my audience, as if I had one. I just don’t know. What I do know is that I have this book and I have this pen. I have my thoughts and I’m writing them down. I wonder how many times I’ve used the word I. I also wonder if I will be consistent in my writing, or unknowingly skip from first person to third person. No matter how, I’m sure it will be just fine. My book I mean. 

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