Carpe Noctem I – CH: 2

Before you read, if you are new to my blog I would encourage you to read the Preface to Carpe Noctem I – HERE. I would also encourage you to read chronologically. Reading the preface, and the chapters in order, will give you the best understanding and idea of this Journal Blog. Enjoy!


Chapter Two – Second Intro of Today

Remembering back, my intro was not much of an intro at all. I haven’t read it, but I recollect that I’ve only spoken my age. I’ve also only written my name in the front. So I’ll state it again here. My name is Jacob Kirts. I’ve been a part of this existence, whatever that may be, for twenty nine years. My next birthday will be in March. Thirty, yes thirty. An end to the era of my twenties. Despite the age you are when you read this, whoever you are, my life has been full of life, love and the pursuit of happiness. I believe the U.S. Constitution uses the word liberty instead of love. To make a long story short, I grew up in a military family with my mother and father, along with two younger brothers. After graduating High School, I tried college but didn’t exactly enjoy it too much. I dropped out and joined the United States Army. From May 2008 until this present day, being a soldier has been my profession. I suppose that there is a lot to tell, it’s been about ten and a half years. In a previous chapter I said that it’s felt like I’ve already lived a lifetime. However, I’m not sure if it’s something I want to boast about. Through out my time I’ve been told that I’ve “Done more in the Army than most people do in a lifetime”. Part of myself believes this is true, and another part of me believes that a lot of civilians have done more than me. I’ve never tried to compare accolades, but I’m smart enough to know that there is much more to the world than what I’ve seen or what I think I know. I’m not sure if that constitutes me patting myself on the back, or years of forced maturity from the military. Maybe I have a certain level of sound understanding, or maybe I’m just full of myself. I guess my perception is my reality. I can see anyone else telling me their own thoughts and going either way with the subject. Maybe maturity is subjective and can only be judged by others, or maybe one can be extremely self aware. Regardless, my time in the military has undoubtedly helped mold the person I am today. Other factors include the way I was raised, the country I was born, the people I know and other various outliers of influence. Random thought, maybe “this” isn’t a book of my wandering mind. Maybe it’s just an insignificant rambling of my thoughts. A small collection of blurbs splattered onto these pages with no train of thought. I sure hope not. Perhaps I should be concerned with other events in my perceived reality instead of writing. May I just like it. Writing to write. This is supposed to be my second intro, and you’ve not gained much more knowledge about me. Maybe I will write a third intro, maybe not. This collection of ramblings may be telling you more about myself than I know. I wonder if I will read this. If I do, does that make me a narcissist? I’m sure I will laugh and say “What am I even saying here, and what is my point?” I’m currently outside writing and the weather is beautiful. Notice there are no rain spots on this book currently. The sky is blue and the clouds are dispersed in foggy see through shapes. I’m smoking a cigarrette. I spelled that wrong. I smoke a brand called Marlboro. Marlboro Reds, cowboy killers they say. I  just say, well at least I’m not a cowboy. Then again, it could be referred to a man who is care free and reckless. Or an adventure and thrill seeker, and to that extent, in many ways, I am like a cowboy. While training in Canada, one of the older sergeants there referred to our platoon as a group of “Undisciplined Cowboys”. Jokingly or not, it made sense. Most of the soldiers wanted to go out on the town and have fun, experience the country. To be honest it’s quite like the United States. Now the bugs are starting to come out, but it’s nice outside. The sun is starting to go out, giving the clouds a small orange and pinkish appearance. First world problems I suppose, deciding if I should go into the house or not. I’m sure once the natural light dissipates i’ll go inside to continue writing. To continue to introduce myself, I must say I have an addiction to caffeinated beverages. Specifically a brand called Monster. I liked Red Bull for a while, but they don’t offer the same deals that Monster does. You can purchase two Monsters for four dollars most of the time. Red Bull is just too expensive. They both taste good, but why pay more for the same amount of caffeine? So between smoking and drinking energy drinks, plus time and pain of the Army, I can only guess my life expectancy. While talking about life expectancy may be morbid, it certainly is a part of life. As the saying goes, “Only two things are promised in life, death and taxes”. I came to terms with the eventuality of death when I was a young child. I was living in Germany with my parents and we were watching The Three Musketeers. A lady, who’s name I don’t remember, just jumps from a cliff and commits suicide. I remember it was very upsetting as my mother tried to comfort me. She explained that we all die, and it’s just a part of life. Anyone who embraces death is a sociopath, but we can all understand that it’s unavoidable. We are able to choose how we live in this life with the cards we are given. I believe that life should not be wasted, that we should live it to the best of our ability and most importantly, enjoy it. We all do this in our own way. Right now, in my life, I’ve chosen to purchase books and write. Writing and reading, unless mandatory for school or work, is not just something I’ve ever enjoyed to do. It was only until recently that I’ve discovered the joy of this. It seems the sun is fading more and that it’s appropriate to start a new chapter inside.

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